


Castiel’s Conclusion

by ItsmeM8



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Cas and his wisdom, Fluff, Gen, It’s just pineapple dude, Winchester downtime
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-02
Updated: 2020-09-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:27:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26257132
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ItsmeM8/pseuds/ItsmeM8
Summary: Castiel solves Sam and Dean’s childish dispute with his words of heavenly wisdom.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 6
Collections: Supernatural





	Castiel’s Conclusion

**Author's Note:**

> I don’t even know what brought about this oneshot, but here ya go, enjoy.

“Listen, I’m not okay. I know I said I was, but I'm not,” his brother told him, looking down at his dinner plate. “I’ve lost so many people I love, Sam. Please don’t make me have to bury you too.”

“I’m sorry,” the younger brother started, a frown pulling at his face. “It’s too late to change it.”

“You knew what you were doing when you ordered, how can you be sorry?” Dean spit as he glared across the table at Sam.

“Dean, it's just pineapple.”

The angel sitting next to Dean looked down at the soggy slice he held, its cheese slowly slipping down the crust and threatening to slide into his lap. “You like cheese, ham, and pineapple. I don’t understand the issue.” 

“Separately, I like them separately!” Dean retorted as he grabbed the pizza from Cas before it had the chance to fall onto his pants. Cas stared at Dean, watching him pick each squishy yellow triangle off the pizza he stole and flicking them in Sam’s direction before returning the slice to Cas’ hand with a huff of discontent. “Try this. It’s a little less of a disgrace now.”

Sam picked up the pineapple thrown at him and added it to his slice before taking a big bite and producing a loud moan of approval as he went in for a second. Cas, thoroughly confused on the topic, was sure a pizza topping was not enough reason to wish death upon Sam as Dean had.

“Disgusting,” Dean mumbled, taking the slice back out of Castiel’s grasp and sinking his teeth into the now just cheese and ham piece. 

“That was my slice, Dean.”

Cas merited a nod in response. It’s not like he was very interested in the food beyond the controversy of topping preferences anyways.

Cas tried out different explanations, attempting to educate himself on the topic at hand. Perhaps because the pineapple and the pizza were not suited for one another in the traditional making of the food, Dean was dissatisfied at the level of unprofessionalism. He then considered it could have something to do with the base properties of dairy mixed with the acidic pineapple and the effects it could have on the human stomach. 

After a long silence of chewing and licking fingers, Castiel piped up with his conclusion, “It is like a cat and dog.”

Sam, having finished his last piece, looked at him with confusion. “What was that Cas?”

“I like the creatures, they are unique, but if you put them together they will fight.” Cas thought a moment more. “Some humans enjoy cruelty and indulge themselves in the sin while others follow a righteous path, just as you enjoy pineapple on your pizza and Dean does not.”

At this, Dean almost spit what he was chewing across the room trying to suppress a laugh, and Castiel didn’t know why, as his statement was meant in seriousness. Sam on the other hand, stared slack jawed at Cas. 

“Did you just,” Dean started, slapping a hand on Cas’ shoulder and dipping his head to laugh more, unable to finish his statement. 

Sam picked up for his brother. “An angel of the lord just called Hawaiian pizza a sin.”

“Well,” Castiel paused, picking his words with extreme care as to not escalate the situation. “Yes.”


End file.
